DOUBLE EMPATHY
Misunderstanding goes both ways
originally written about by Dr Damian Milton in 2012
What is it?
Double Empathy describes what happens when different neurotypes struggle to understand each other. It is not a lack of empathy, but a mismatch in communication style, interpretation and lived experience.
Why does it exist?
Different neurotypes often perceive, process and interpret experiences in different ways. When expectations are based on one way of thinking, another person’s response may appear wrong even when it is entirely valid.
Where is it?
This can happen in any interaction, but systems built around neurotypical expectations often increase misunderstanding for neurodivergent people across education, work, services and everyday communication.
Who is impacted?
People with different neurotypes can experience repeated misunderstanding when communication, interpretation and expectations do not align. Over time, this mismatch can affect relationships, support and interaction across systems.
A SIMPLE EXPLANATION
This video explains Double Empathy in an easy to understand and accessible way.
Although The Autistic Advocate references experiences between autistic and neurotypical people,
many with lived experience report this phenomenon occurring between any of the different neurotypes.
​Without understanding or recognising this difference, frustration builds and conflict often follows.
KEY INSIGHTS
Different neurotypes experience, interpret and respond to the world in different ways.
Communication breakdown occurs because people perceive and process information differently.
Behaviour and responses may be misunderstood when viewed through a neurotypical lens alone.
Recognising Double Empathy shifts the focus away from blame and toward mutual understanding.
Understanding mismatch is important in recognising why misunderstanding repeatedly occurs.
Double Empathy helps explain why misunderstanding can repeatedly occur; especially within systems built around one dominant way of thinking.